Why do I hate the supposedly ‘ethical’ expats?

My personal pet hate of the current time probably goes far beyond merely hating the millennial social justice warrior that you commonly see everywhere these days. It even goes beyond the blatant self-righteousness of vegans who feel that a regular, conventional part of your lifestyle is in some way or another, wrong. As for the those that say that there are a thousand different genders, I’ll let the locals tell them what they think about that kind of thing. They’ll probably be offered two options: Nam và nữ

Subconsciously, we may easily feel that something is not quite right with those people who are intent upon doing good in the world, yet crave some form of recognition for their efforts. Like the nerdy boy sat at the front of the classroom who was always eager for the attention of the teacher, there are also those that try to compensate for their failure to succeed within other areas of life, by trying to make their personal beliefs a part of their ongoing persona; as without their ideologies, they may feel like they have little or no value.

To be honest, I have not quite come to a full conclusion explaining why we naturally find ourselves hating these people so much. Logic may even dictate that if somebody does something good, we should react positively towards them; we should reward them to ensure that such correct behaviour is repeated. This has been pushed ever since we were all nothing but small children, when we often craved the praise of our parents for doing the right thing. When we were little, a chocolate bar would suffice. As adults, we’ll expect a pay-rise. Maybe even some public recognition. However, one could also ask if that is exactly where we have been going wrong. Why do we hate these ‘ethical people’ exactly? Should we not love them for being eager to do good for the world?

It could relate to their obvious hypocrisy, one example of this being that many a vegan based in Western countries will show anger at the thought of a fellow human daring to consume a meat product just like they have done for several millennia previously; yet will happily shove a product that metaphorically speaking has the blood of thousands on it right up their nostrils every weekend without a care in the world. Free trade cocaine does not exist, FACT.

Locally, there are also those privileged foreign guests that feel entitled to rant about shopkeepers or waitresses that earn a salary that equates to less than their monthly rent alone, just because they dared to give them a plastic bag to carry their groceries or a plastic straw for their drink; despite the fact that these same people will happily consume various products that are produced overseas, often in their home countries; which have to be packaged, shipped and delivered to Vietnam for them to consume.

Pollution may be a real genuine problem locally and the fact that there are some people that are helping to pick up litter to help the community is an admirable positive action that should be encouraged. However, my opinion can quickly turn against them when the people involved in such efforts seize the opportunity to publicly criticise local people or try to make you feel guilty about your own behaviour, despite that you are a civilised person that does not litter and knows how to use a rubbish bin.

Such people are the local equivalent to those self-loathing social justice warriors back home who tell younger white people that have passionately opposed racial prejudice ever since the day that they were able to become fully aware of the concept, possibly predating the time that the first words came out of their mouth; that their very existence is in itself, racist. They’re loud, they’re obnoxious and worst of all, they’re bloody miserable. Why, exactly? Here’s a clue:

“a person who is obsessed with the desire for recognition does not have any community feeling yet, and has not managed to engage in self-acceptance, confidence in others, or contribution to others.”

Excerpt From:

The Courage to Be Disliked

Ichiro Kishimi & Fumitake Koga

Let’s discard the political correctness and common courtesies for a second and consider some of the realities of what is taking place here. Most of these ethical expats have never been able to feel that they belong to their community back home and also find themselves struggling to find a true place for themselves within the local community that they have relocated to overseas. Usually, these people are not particularly attractive, nor successful. They massively desire acceptance, they need to feel that it is OK to be here, not just here in Da Nang, but here on this planet in general.

Unable to get the very best jobs, speak the local language or even be an object of sexual desire, these people many subconsciously perceive themselves to be in lacking value. Having fallen for the various hedonistic lies that are commonly pushed in the modern day often relating to feminism or liberal arts degrees and so on, self-acceptance is not going to come easily. I’ll admit that reaching a state of self-acceptance is in itself painful and difficult, so it will never happen overnight for most of us, not just these particular people that I am speaking of.

Feeling cut off from the local community and not being a fully accepted part of it, as most Asian nations are very ethno-nationalist compared to those of the West; it can be difficult to show confidence in others when there are literally hundreds of people out there trying to target you with scams based on your ethnicity; you will never be considered to fully be one of their own. You will naturally see some people as enemies and not fellow comrades on this earth and I even suspect that the feeling is mutual.

That very same book which I have quoted from does distinguish between ‘trust’ and ‘confidence’ in others as NOT being exactly the same thing. Yet, it is obvious that these people are unable to show confidence in anybody else whatsoever. Nor are they are they able to accept themselves for who they are; thus will seek to judge others as they are unable to form horizontal relationships with others; they still seek praise and recognition from others and treat others accordingly.

Like the bullies many of these people were targeted by (or should have been targeted by) at school, they are deep down insecure in some way or another. None of us may be perfect and also have our own issues, yet their own pursuit of superiority possibly relates to the fact that they are most likely currently unable to offer much of real value to the world. If these people were able to truly feel secure within themselves, they would clean up without hoping to be recognised for their efforts; they would feel no need to condemn others, but would seek to offer thanks to those that are able to help them. They would contribute to their community and know deep within their hearts that they are doing good in this world. We can rejoice in these decent people merely being there and the fact that they exist without solely considering the effects of their individual acts. These are the good people that I can respect. Not those that want a sticker or yet another pat on the back to reward them for their social justice struggles.